jueves, 16 de junio de 2016

Update on my survey: Young, bright... but hopeless

Last time I spoke to my supervisor I told him I am planning to get around 100 participants for my survey. Just one week and I need to set a new goal. Young people are responding the questions and leaving long comments. It´s so heart-breaking to read all of them, that I feel the necessity to stop and take a deep breath. I am deeply affected and reminds me of all the headship I´ve been through. And I am not even there yet.
And I am not even "young". People are brutally honest with me, saying that people at my age and education have been managing huge projects. I have certainly failed, but even if I am not "young" anymore I am still fighting like one.
They go as far as saying what they would like to read and hear more of my opinion. Just with their comments I have half of my work done.
There is such an interest in my survey and people got it so serious (to my surprise and satisfaction) that I can´t understand why they get so upset because of some reason they were unable to finish the survey. There is a huge, burning desire somebody to hear them and blindly believing that somebody may solve their problem when the rest of Europe can´t even find Macedonia on the map.
We are not talking about highly educated people that have a lot to say and they are using every bit of my survey (the last part is to give their opinion) to do that.
Looks like I have nailed it with my chosen methodology knowing that people would feel more motivated in the comfort of their home instead of chasing them around Macedonia. I get participants from all over the country. Macedonia has a very good coverage and high speed internet connection. Young people use phone and computer to connect. Anyway, I was too scared to walk houses and be bitten by dogs.
We are hearing about initiatives regarding Europe's  youth unemployment, but that is nothing compared to Macedonian youth. They don´t need to be more educated or skilled, just to build up their self-confidence and take the initiative in their own hands. No initiative can be that important if they don´t include Macedonia, where there is a rampant unemployment and very low employment rate overall. The youth unemployment is among the highest, more than 50 percent. No youth initiative can call itself European (and it´s not even worth looking at) if it doesn´t include Macedonia and maybe the rest of Europe that we are not so proud off.
Unfortunately, this is just a Msc Development studies dissertation in some university, where all my professors think I am a complete idiot and the rest that I should just kill myself for being useless to find a job in what I am studding for ages.
I chose to study something not only what I am passionate about but also something I can speak my mind and hoping that somebody can use my ideas.
Not "young" and not "smart" but still believing that my dissertation can reach far beyond the University board and touch people hearts the way they touched mine.
I got so emotional when I read all the comments Macedonian youth leaves for me, and I know that I am doing a great thing choosing to tackle a problem that really matters and share it with the public.
That is my motivation to do great on my dissertation and believing if it´s too good I might be able to share my suggestion to solving the problem with relevant institutions and they might do something about that.
We all know I am not getting the best mark for my work, but that wont´t discourage me. I have better motivation than that. In fact I got the best motivation. And I have had great marks in the past, but that nothing changed. Why bother to impress few when I can do more than that.
The world of international development is itself full of contradictions and injustice. And than, there is the rest of the world equally unjust and scary, to say at least.
Let´s just brace ourselves and leave it to the rich kids to get us out of the misery. Unfortunately, being poor is missing on all the good chances.

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